What’s up Fear facer!

No long post today, no! Need to pack, leaving town 04.00 tomorrow morning.  Flying to Croatia for an all weekend conference trip! It’s going to be really nice! …As soon as I’ve done my 2×45 min presentations. Or conversations as i prefer to call them:)

Routine #3 –  Daily Fear Facing

– what could I do, what could I do…

Social interactions. Several occasions at work today where I pushed myself to go socialize, even though  I didn’t want to!

Routine #2 – New thing:

– Opps

Forgot about this one today! Fortunately, the whole weekend is going to be overwhelming with new things and impression, so I think I’ll be alright:)

Routine #3 – Daily Fail:

– presentation

My planning… I’m still working on my presentation, haven’t got the powerpoint and the material done. Deadline for this was a week ago! BIG LEARNING – Prepare better and earlier.  Easier said than done, but it hurts now, and that’s always a good sign for remembering something!

What fears are you facing tomorrow?

🙂

/Alex

Routine #3 –  Daily Fear Facing

– what could I do, what could I do…

I’ve been so up in my own world the whole day, thinking about the theory of fears, that I actually didn’t get down to facing any! UNitll I had to run out just no to return a book. One of those days where a low hanging fruit is okay. So much stuff going on. Decided to interact with some stranger. one past after the other. Couldn’t seem to find the opportunity, the right opportunity. 100 meters left until I was back home again. Walked past a girl, upper 20’s . She had a really cool style, unique jacket, cool glasses and colours that popped yet matched in a way that really spoke to me. I past her. I PAST HER. No Alex, no. I stopped. Turned back and without hesitation approached told her just that. She smiled and was happy. Seemed happy. I was happy. Daily fear facing – check.

Routine #2 – New thing:

– a banana for you my friend 

As a result of a great TED-talk I saw the other week, I’ve been trying to get some random acts of kindness in daily. Mostly around the home concerning my brother. But as I was walking home with a backpack filled with bananas after a quick grocery store pit stop, an opportunity emerged. Walked by a homeless man. Instinctively the idea popped up. Stopped. Gave him a banana. Nothing special. But the warm smile that man gave me just filled me up.  Top moment of the day. It’s about the small things.

Routine #3 – Daily Fail:

– presentation

Thought I had it in order by now.  Did a practice run. Failed it. Still so many doubts about what should go in the presentation. 45 min is a long time to talk. But the fail made me go through yet another iteration process.

See you tomorrow, Fear Facer,

/Alex

Yo – what’s up Fear Facer?

New Week, new opportunities to face some fears and grow some.

Yesterday’s Fear Facing, video down below. For sure was a great fail experience. It made me realize how confused I was about some pieces of the content.  Speaking it all out loud in one session, without allowing myself to constantly stop and correct small stuff, was so insightful.

Routine #3 –  Daily Fear Facing

– Unsocial going social

This weekend was a bit special, was so focused on sitting inside writing all weekend. No real socializing beside my public speaking practice. And, to be frank, that whole thing shook me up some. I felt like I had so so much left to work on before being able to pull it off.  Which put me in a bit of a downer mood. Also, my acne coincidently started blowing up like I just turned 15 again.

Walking into the office this morning I felt like I didn’t want to be there. I just wanted to go home again. To be left alone. I was afraid to interact because I felt I couldn’t do it. Insecure.

BUT I quickly realized this was emotions of fear that crippled me. After pinpointing this, I knew there was only one thing to do. Face those fears. Own it. Go be social. Prove yourself wrong. So I did., I sought out opportunities and I threw myself into them. And even though it was a  bit of a rocky start, rather quickly I was back on track. And it totally changed my mood. Looking back at the day, I can now say It was a really good one. Both in terms of connecting with people, as well as improving my presentation and confidence to my presentation.

Routine #2 – New thing:

My daily new thing habit is to force myself to not get stuck in old habits and routines, stagnating my thought patterns. Look up joe Dispenza for more on this! Just like with the fear facing thing, it’s about keeping the habit going. Doesn’t always have to be big things!

– Tried a new tea flavour.  

Yeah, that’s about what happened. Really nice one though;). chamomile honey and some more. Yoggi eco herbal tea.

Routine #3 – Daily Fail:

I had an uncomfortable email looking at me in my inbox today. I neglected to face my fears of dealing with it. Took me 3 hours until I finally did. But trying to put the lid on things like these only – subconsciously & consciously  – drains us on energy. I should have faced that fear head on straight away. Wasted some energy, but learnt from the experience and hopefully next time I will deal with it sooner.

See you tomorrow, Fear Facer,

/Alex

Routine #3 –  Daily Fear Facing

– Let’s take it public

Sunday. I really don’t want to do what I’m about to write. The only reason I spontaneously opened up a new blog post right now is because I need the power of social commitment pushing me. I’m preparing for my presentation next Saturday, or “conversation” as I’d prefer to call it. But I have this idea of going out to practice at a public little stage in the park nearby. That would really put me in a good practice environment. But also, that’s f*ckning scary. I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to do it. But… BUT, I dare my self. Fear challenge accepted. I’m going for it. That’s the daily fear facing action, and it’s going to happen.

Gotdamn routine and stupid me.

☐ Go out to the park and practice public speaking.

4 Hours later. Back home. Haha…  I did it.  I F*cking did it. But it really, really, really was a push for me. Haven’t felt this anxious or worrisome or nervouse before doing something in I don’t know how long.

Details? You’ll just have to watch the video yourself to find out.

Routine #2 –  Do something New

– Well, haven’t done public speaking in ages, so that counts as today’s new thing!

Routine #3 – Fail of the day

– I for sure wasn’t smooth through my practice run. Failure is one word to describe it.  but it gave me soo much insight on how to tweak it. So a VITAL fail for my improvement.

08,00: Saturday morning. Been procrastinating for an hour now. I really need to work on my presentation. My Little brother is building himself a new computer just next to me, and my all over the place hungry brain now wants to do that too. I KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO TODAY: I KNOW WHAT I MUST FOCUS ON. I NEED TO DARE MYSELF, TO PUT UP A FEAR CHALLENGE IF THIS IS GOING TO WORK. AND I NEED TO PUT IT OUT HERE TO UTILIZE THE POWER OF SOCIAL COMMITMENT TOO.

– The Fear Dare

Free from all kinds of internet and social media until 18.00 this evening. Unless it’s critical to move forward on my presentation. No, this is not a lope whole. Let’s f*ucking do this.

Also, would you be interested in an EMail notification/news letter every time I post?

Routine #1 – Daily fear facing:

– Live Fear

Live stream at my YouTube channel. Doing a live stream is always a bit scary to me, even though I’ve done it so many times. Although this time I have to say I was rather looking forward to doing it. Been thinking so much about how to present myself lately since I’m doing my big presentation next week at our work conference in Croatia. To some extent, I feel more anxiety about it than ever since It’s still a bit fuzzy and only a week away. But another part of me is looking forward to it like heck. I know I enjoy standing in front of a crowd if I’m confident in the message I want to deliver. I’ll get there.

Because of all this, lately, I’ve been watching a whole lot of talks for inspiration. I came across two of my favourite Ted-talks that has impacted me. Both talks are hilarious and worth watching only if you want a good laugh. But they do carry great take away as well.

The first one is one the incredible power and importance of deadlines, especially for personal/creative projects.

The second one, well I’ll share that one tomorrow ?.

I’m going down to buy some food NOW, and I will be addressing some stranger. Not quite in the mood for it, but it’ll be worth it. Historic events at least favourite that outcome.

Routine #2 – Doing something New

– Early Birdy

I’m going to go to bed 22.30 the latest a Friday evening! I’m going to do the same repetitive habit each morning before my talk. Early evening, early morning. Then have myself a practice run with my presentation!

– Snack Hack

I’m going to find something new in the grocery store and try that out for the evening treat!

Routine #3 – The Daily Fail ( New one ! )

Failing is great. That’s the mindset I need to live by, hence I’m going to make sure I fail every day!

– Being sloppy

I had a colleague call me about a post I had done for my company. It had a spelling mistake. Embarrassing. Perfectly human. The thing is, I had done it twice. That’s just sloppy. Taught me to read it through more carefully the next time.

See you tomorrow, Fear Facer,

/Alex

07:39: Hahah…. Once again I can’t help not laughing myself into a blog post. It’s when I  surprise myself like this I can’t hold my feelings back. Starting the day off in just the right way.

– Treadmill dare

Yeah, nothing big or fancy. Woke up at 05.00. Worked for an hour. Went down for an easy walk. Was gonna read some. Then again… The idea of challenging myself for the same run I did a week ago popped up. And once it was out there… Well:).

So I did. 5 km as fast as I Could. Not going below 13 km/h. GOT DAMN IT WAS AWFUL. I just wanted to quit from the moment I started. Or well I also got so psyched and pumped that if a cocktail of mixed emotions. Dopamine. Adrenaline. Joy, pain, fear of enduring this for any loner, fear of letting myself down. I listened to some motivational Youtube videos that for sure helpt pumping me up. But I did it. I f*cking did it.  22:46 is the time to beat. Assuming the treadmill is measuring the distance right.

Now the time in itself doesn’t mean shit. It’s how I FELT pushing through that matters. This is always on an individual level.

BUT, the BONUS FEAR action that came as a result of my joy trip came when I went outside the gym. The first person I met, just like the other week, I stopped. It was a woman in her 30’s walking with earphones lost in her own world.

“excuse me”

I said, and she stoped and took her earphones out

“Can i just wish you a great day”

I said with a huge grin.

“haha, sure”

She responded and smiled back.

That was the start of my awesome day. And even though I know it’s going to continue being a great one, if, just IF it happens to turns shitty. I’m still going to remember this as a good one.

Whish you all a great uncomfortable day, Fear Facers,

/Alex

Routine #1 – Daily fear facing:

– Cold shower

Haven’t been any daily cold showers lately. But when I stood there this morning, 04,55 that realization hit me with a fear slap. F*ck. Must do it now. Embrace yourself, here we goo! It was nice.

– Third time for the win

Monday, Tuesday and today Wednesday. I’ve dared to challenge myself to a super intense fasted focused work day. Ending it with an equally intense workout. During the workout, I reflected upon these days, and there for sure has been some drawbacks. As I also mentioned in yesterday’s blog. But perhaps the biggest one has been when I’ve ended it. When I’ve lowered the guard. Because then my willpower totally has gone out the window, and I haven’t been able to edit a video effectively. Which really is something I need to get done as well. Yeah, it’s an intense period right now.

This got me thinking about the “will-power-theory” stating that we have a limited amount of willpower to use up during the day. Unless we are being very smart about it and recharge. Which I haven’t been able to. This was just a reflection, but I for sure think there’s a middle way to make it work. Not being so hardcore throughout the day. Overall there for sure still has been a pay-off worth it. I’ve gotten to know a new Alex these past days, and I’m impressed.

The second reflection I made is how this relates to fears. This whole thing with putting up a challenge and going for it. When I look at it as fear action, I’m able to push myself to a whole new level. But it can be broken down to several more layers of fears. I believe the main fear, at least for me, is to dare to put up the challenge. That’s what gets me started. Dare to say “okay, I’m not going to eat for 20 hours now. I’m not going to do anything but work on this task now.” Putting it out there means I run the risk of disappointing myself. And to me, that’s the worst thing ever. That’s one of the benefits of working on your self-esteem. Living with integrity – words and behaviours match.

But then there are all the follow-up fears related to the action. Like working focused and not procrastinating for example – staying in the uncomfortableness and doing the tough actions. Pushing through, writing that sentence, making that call, taking time to plan for what comes next. But it starts with daring to take on the challenge. Identifying it and then naming it.

This is actually how I look at fears after reflecting upon it today:

1. Awareness – Identify and name your fears fear

2. Call your bluff stories

3. Take action

Anyways, in an effort to squeeze the very last willpower out of me today. I’m putting up a evening challenge – removing temptations. No Facebook or Gmail this evening. It’s going to be great. Aah, Just throwing it out there makes me so hungry to win over myself!

Routine #2 – Doing something New

I’m going to be listening to a Swedish stand-up routine while cooking my food. Laughing some! Hopefully. That is as soon as I hit post on this one?.

See you tomorrow, Fear Facer,

/Alex

Routine #2 – Doing something New

See you tomorrow, Fear Facer,

/Alex

Routine #1 – Daily fear facing:

 – Dare to challenge myself, again

Yesterday I put up a fasting challenge and going hardcore focus on one task. It was amazing. And so was the fasted workout I did afterwards. Or well, I actually I took an EAA drink just before the workout. But 40 kcal of energy doesn’t really give you any energy boost. Not that I needed it, because the energy yesterday was intense.

But so when I woke up today, I was a bit curious to see if I could repeat yesterday’s doing. However, subconsciously it scared me so I never fully articulated these thoughts. At first. Because then my awareness radar beeped, and I identified the fear. I still had a ton of work to do and really could benefit from another super Productive day.

So, repeat Challenge: Super focused work day punctuated with a strength workout. All fasted. Reward: Evening dinner.

And once again, here I am. Just having finished an AMAZING WORK DAY & A BLOD PUMPING CHEST/TRICEPS WORKOUT. I don’t know if it’s the fasting, my ability to stay focused to the all-in determination, or if it’s a combination of it all. But I’m living it, I’m loving it and I’m repeating it.

– Express my type of humour

We have an internal social media platform kind of like Facebook. It also has a wall where You can post whatever on. Usually, it’s related to a business or some kind of event that has happened. Anyways, I’d taken a picture of one of my colleges last week. Which he and I had a discussion about yesterday as he thought I didn’t come off happy on pictures.

So today I felt like messing around a bit with him and posted the picture on the wall with a humoristic funny tone to it. Making it a questionnaire about what his thoughts were. It was all in good spirit and it was a really nice picture. It felt a bit out of my comfort zone, but it was an expression of my type of humour and who I am – so I did it.

Later during the day one of my other colleges said that she didn’t get the point of the post. I explained but I’m not sure that she thought it was that funny. Hard to tell, and you know where my worst-case-scenario-brain instinctively goes. But it doesn’t matter as long as I didn’t hurt anyone. Which I really don’t think I did! And I still think it was funny. But I couldn’t help but to be a bit anxious about it. But this is good practice, standing up for who you are and expressing that can be really tough!

Routine #2 – Doing something New

– ….

As the time right now is closing in on 17,00, I haven’t been able to do something new. Yet. Or well, when I think about it I tried a new Green Tea flavour today. That was nice. But I’m in the mood for something more, so we’ll see what the evening has to offer!

See you tomorrow, Fear Facer,

/Alex

Hey you, hope your week is off to a good start!

Routine #1 – Daily fear facing:

 – Dare to challenge myself

08:17 –  Okay, haven’t’ faced any fears today, yet. But I’m going to put one out here to challenge myself to do it… A big part of the fear facing is daring to go for it. Even though you know you may fail. That’s as scary as the action in itself.

So my challenge is a combined fear of 20 hours fast and my fear of sitting down to finalize my presentation material. The thing is, today is probably the only day I won’t be hijacked by all the other musts at work. So the plan, the fear, is to clear my schedule and ONLY focus on this until it’s 95% done. The reward will be that I’m allowed to eat this afternoon. If I’m done that is:).

Had to put this one out here, otherwise, I wouldn’t dare to throw myself into it. Wish me good luck. Social commitment for the win!

Update:  18:17

So how did it go? Well, the focus and intensity I’ve had throughout my workday have been on a new level. Out of this world. With the fasting and the outcome-based goal, I’ve just killed it. Nothing was able to put me off my track. I made quick good decisions and I was productive as heck. Knowing that eating wasn’t even an option made me totally let go of it. No energy waste on cravings for the soon to come food, as it tends to be. I Just worked super concentrated with short breaks. Breaks I had to force myself to, only to not fu*k up my body. Even though some other small things I needed attend came up, I handled them with precision in a way that impressed myself.

“Damn, good job Alex. Good job”

 

– Social Fears

Besides this, I also had some minor social fear facing. But it came with relative ease due to my state. Very fascinating.

Routine #2 – Doing something New

– Went to the gym in the afternoon. Fasted.

I haven’t had an afternoon strength exercise in ages. Partly due to my deeply implemented morning routine, starting the day off with a workout. But also, because I’ve adopted this belief that I’ll just be hungry and tired after work. Almost like it can’t be done. Fixed mindset. I sure proved myself wrong.

As I’m currently at the gym at the point of writing this, winding down on the bike. I must conclude that I haven’t experienced a workout like this in… Actually, it’s a new kind of experience. I think the combination of the incredible flow state and focus I’ve had throughout the day has put me in some kind of superstate. The energy, the intensity, the strength. I can literally feel how I’ve got tunnel vision, but in a good intense way. At least in this context. It’s like I’m on some kind of drug. I’ve had an incredible workout. A workout I’ll look back at thinking –

Man, I wish I’d get that again.

I don’t know what my conclusion of this experience is. But the fact is that me daring to throw myself into this challenge, was the best thing that could’ve happened today. Yes, that’s a total exaggeration. But you’re smart enough to figure that out.

So, did I finish? No, not quite. But I put in such a good effort that I consider it a win, and I don’t believe I could have done it in a much better way. With that being said (and felt), I’m going to treat myself with a dinner after more than 20 hours of fasting and an amazing day. Today I experienced a new Alex I look forward to seeing more of.

See you tomorrow, Fear facer,

/Alex