The Climax – Facing Public Speaking Fear

Routine #1 –  Daily Fear Facing

– Present at the company conference in Croatia

SO FINALLY, THE TIME HAD COME! The moment I’d feared for so long. SO LONG. Talking in front of a bunch of people at the company conference.  The last time I did some kind of presentation longer than 5 minutes was like 4 years ago. And even then there were two of us. Now I’d been asked to do a 40-ish minute presentation, one time in Swedish and one time in English. First session around 80 people, second 40-ish. A bunch is a relative measurement;).

It’s been hanging over me like 5000 kgs of chashewes ever since I got to know about this in the middle of June. But at the same time, I knew I had to do it, I had identified this fear that really aligned with my goals and values in terms of where I want to go in life. There was no question about. Yet, I hadn’t done any real public speaking in such a long time, so it kind of… No. Not kind of. It really scared the crap out of me. BUT, through tons of practice and preparation and grounding myself in my goals, I’ve kept myself motivated, and I’ve also in some twisted way really have been looking forward to doing it.

And so today, this morning at 8.30. It all started. The Climax point of this journey.

I for sure was really nervous. But filled with fear – EXCITEMENT – I started. And I continued. And I delivered. Certainly had some moments where I blanked out and got off track, but I managed to control the fear and get back up there in a playful way. It wasn’t me versus them, It was a shared experience. Most of the time I stayed in a state of flow, I dared to act out and bring the energy in an authentic way. Laughter and engagement.

The two sessions felt so different, I shared different stories and had different reactions. But I did have very nice reactions after both my presentations. People coming up to talk to me, sharing their stories and how they could relate. Some were really moved. And that in termed moved me deeply. Only those reactions in itself made it all so worth it. So worth it.

All this led to the most intense incredible feeling of proudness ever when it comes to fears I’ve met. And it got me hungry for more. As always. That’s some of the power of active fear facing. The kick – it’s addictive.

Now, the idea was that I was supposed to record this and put it out on My YouTube channel tomorrow… However… Se My daily fail.

Routine #2 – New thing:

– What’s not??

This whole 4-day trip is all filled to the limit with new experiences and doings. That’s what’s so good about getting away for a weekend or longer vacations on a regular basis. To shake your stale thought pattern and thinking up. Throw it all out and at least temporary reset the system. Meeting new people, pausing from some of your routines and the usual way of life without even having to work for the change. It’s just there.

Today we visited the old town of Dubrovnik and had a big company team challenge. So much fun. So many beautiful environments and scenery to take in. And bonding in the essence of true team spirit. Awesome day. awesome.

Routine #3 – Daily Fail:

– Recording the presentation 

BIG FAIL. BIG. The hour leading up to my presentation, I miscalculated my and ended up doing some last minute changes in my material and such that I forgot to hook up my audio recording gear properly. Oh it hurts. I so badly wanted a good recording of this. Well, next time, I’ll think back of this moment and not do that mistake again.

OKAY, that’s hit for now. Need to SUIT up for the big evening gala dinner. It’s going to be nice. My only worries are that my body, now when the tension has been released, allows itself to get sick. My brother had some shit going all of last week, and I can feel something crawling withing now. Fingers crossed.

See you tomorrow, Fear Facers,


About the author: alenils

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